The Mess of Our Lives
‘It’s not one cobweb; it’s everything. There’s no food and nowhere to cook, it’s filthy and cold and we can’t walk or sit in our own goddamn house. We go sideways like crabs through narrow spaces. You see treasures – we see papers and crap, mice droppings and cockroaches.’
Jordan Baxter, a talented songwriter and musician is determined to keep his home life a secret. His mother has a hoarding disorder which means he and his sister, Tabitha, must live in a dirty, cluttered environment. Jordan sleeps in an old caravan on the property to avoid the filth.
When Tabitha is injured, the family is thrown into the spotlight making Jordan even more determined to be free of the mess.
At the heart of this novel for teenagers and adults are big questions concerning mental health and creative ownership, but this is also a story about love and honesty. Sometimes acceptance is at the heart of freedom.
Book Launch
Sunday 20th October 2024
Havelock North Community Centre
The background to The Mess of Our Lives:
This story, published in October 2024 was begun in 2014.
I can look back in my documents and chart the very slow progress of this story, the numerous name changes of the characters, my attitudes to mental health and my knowledge, or lack of, about mental health and child care for disadvantaged children in New Zealand. This book has grown with me and, as it fermented and stalled, I published four other novels. It’s time now to let The Mess of Our Lives take its place on the shelf.
The themes at the heart of this family story are firstly about sibling loyalty. It’s a question and an idea that is always in my mind. I come from a very big family and I’m interested to notice that I mainly set my stories in small families but the idea of doing the right thing by your brother or sister keeps reappearing.
I haven’t ever written about music in this depth before; how to compose a song, where it comes from and once it’s written, how to protect it. From my experience of musicians, there’s an apathy to copyrighting songs, a naive trust that no one will steal your composition. Music is such a vast subject and I think of those school days when talent is raw and emerging, there can be great pieces of work performed and composed. They are rich years before the busyness of life sends many of the musicians towards different careers.
And the hoarding! We live in a society where more and more people, including myself, find it hard to let possessions go. I have always been fascinated by collections and why people keep things. I have been guilty of staring at a house where the clutter is pressing against the windows and I’ve occasionally watched the American TV shows that attempt to sort out extreme hoarders. I often thought about what it would be like for children to live in a house where they can’t move or breathe safely.
The hoarding idea takes me back in a circle to the theme of family. The way all families try and protect their privacy, their front facade, and yet there is a story behind every front door. We’re all hiding the mess of our lives.